Between the Lines: Israel

The Kibbutz from above

For a previous assignment we were asked to interview people in our community to become more in tune with their perceptions of Americans. This began the process of me finding better and greater understanding in the way people outside of America view Americans. The reading for this post also reinforced this understanding. It was mentioned that many people view Americans as superficial or unfaithful to both their friends and their thoughts/opinions/actions. What can be seen on the surface is not always what the American means or feels, but it is generally accepted in America that people smile at strangers when they make eye contact and say things are fine when underneath the veil of cultural norms the individual is experiencing great stress, sadness, turmoil, etc. Overall, we are very introverted and do not share deep personal connection with many. That being said, we have many friendships (most are flimsy) and put the facade of contentedness around our public persona. I believe these things to be generally true about Americans. They are, in fact, generalizations. 

Many of the students that I interviewed for the previous blog mentioned that they think Americans apologize too much. This meaning on an individual basis, like in a crowd, and rarely are sincere. For instance, if someone bumps into a passing individual at a mall it is likely that both parties apologize even if the fault lies in one of the two. This is just one of many examples my interviewees gave, but I think it gets the idea across. And it got me thinking about the other things we tend to do as Americans and questioning how I fit into those assumptions. Then one day I was sitting at lunch and I started to talk about my family in semi-specific and intimate detail. While this didn't seem strange for me, my stories were received with awkward silences and many people glanced toward the ground. Now, I wasn't talking about anything inappropriate, but I thought maybe I offended someone. Later on I asked my Israeli friend what I had done wrong and they simply replied that people were shocked to hear me speak about my personal life so openly. It was not that they were offended by it, but they were shocked and didn't know how to react. It is not rare for people to be quite about their personal lives in Israel too, so I had broken two cultural standards in that regard. 

This is by no means the most severe challenge of assumptions that students studying abroad have felt, I'm sure, but it was interesting to reflect on. Most of the time when I think about cultural misconceptions I think about others living in my environment, not myself. It was interesting to experience this mild event and get to reflect on it productively. I am grateful that more intense occasions have not yet caused greater problems with me or my peers in Israel.