Lessons from Study Away

The city of Quito seen from Pichincha Mountain.

I asked my host dad in San Clemente to share a story about me, or something he would remember about me after I left. I expected him to talk about the time we climbed to the summit of Imbabura Volcano together. Instead, he surprised me with his response. He said he would remember the nights I stayed up late with him and my host sister while they taught me kichwa, their indigenous language. I asked him why he would remember those nights in particular, and he explained that it was nights like those where he felt like I was his second daughter. He was sharing an important part of his culture with me, and I was receptive and curious. He explained that my interest in their culture was a compliment to him and his community.

I concluded earlier in the semester that the best compliment you can give friends of different cultures is your curiosity. They appreciate any attempt to better understand and relate to them. I know that I made both of my host families happiest when I spent time with them and participated in family activities. This conversation with my host dad supports my conclusion. Small things like dinner conversations, helping with chores, or learning a language are how I will be remembered.

Later, I asked one of the friends from Quito the same question. She told the story of the time we spent the day shopping at the mall and then walking around Parque Carolina. I asked her why this day was especially important. She explained that this was the day she realized how similar we were. We had similar tastes in clothes, a similar sense of humor, and similar views of the world. For her, realizing we were so similar despite our different nationalities was “chevere” (cool).

I experienced similar “realizations” pretty often during my time in Ecuador. When you learn about another culture and when you meet new people, it’s so easy to only see the differences. Despite cultural differences, I would argue that we are more similar than different.  My best moments in Ecuador were those when I spent time with my new friends doing the same things and having the same conversations that I could have had with my friends at home. It was these moments when I felt as if the word “foreign” shouldn’t apply to individuals. A culture can be foreign and new, but not an individual. As humans, even if we can’t communicate in the same language, we understand each other surprisingly well. Differences are what make us interesting, but similarities are what unite us